Introduction to The Mind of Friggen BenQ

My grandfather was a great man. It saddens me to think that he has been gone now for several years and yet I find myself thinking about him on occasion. Like today for instance, I am sitting here in my favorite chair, listening to of all things, Sugarland, and wondering what might be a good thing to write about with memories of my grandfather teasing my inner psyche. I am sure that my listening to Sugarland may surprise some of you but I am quite the music lover and take pleasure in many genres of music. Tonight's choice just happened to be Sugarland, and Jennifer Nettles if you are reading this, CALL ME we would love to have you on the show.

My grandfather was a quiet man. He only said something when it was something that needed to be said. When he did speak, you listened. In my real life, that is when I am not acting like a fool on my computer/radio show/social networking site/etc., I am a very different person. I am quiet, I speak softly and I only raise my voice when something warrants an elevated tone. I talk to only a few people about my life as a whole. I have lived such a hard life and been through some very unpleasant things that I find it difficult to talk to people about my feelings. Now before you say to yourself what the hell is Friggen BenQ talking about... I am not going to get all mushy on you and start blogging about my problems or my feelings. What I am going to do though is use this blog to share a little about myself each chance I get so that you get to see there is more to the nutty guy you listen to every week and use this to discuss a pressing issue in my life for the week. With that being said let me get back on topic here.

My grandfather was married for over 50 years to my grandmother. Can you imagine that? Some people don't even live 50 years!!! You think this interesting tidbit is amazing let me tell you about my great-grandparents who were each over 100 years old when they passed away. They were married over 75 years!!! Now that is a statistic that completely amazes me as the world's life expectancy RIGHT NOW is 65 years. They were married longer then MOST PEOPLE LIVE!!! Take a moment to think about that. They survived the Great Depression, World War I and II, Vietnam, Korean War, and all current campaigns. I can't wrap my head around their lives.

I was married for about 8 years to my ex-wife. Our relationship didn't last because of several factors. I was raised in a Christian home that was a broken home as my parents divorced when I was 5. I wanted to break the trend. I wanted to prove them, the world, and myself that my marriage would last and I would "Live Happily Ever After". Boy was I wrong. I have been reading the occasional anniversary post on Facebook or Myspace and I wish those posters well and marital success in a world that is riddled with divorce and infidelity. To all of those not yet celebrating their anniversary this year I wish strength and longevity upon your relationship.

I talk with many friends, often at unusual times of the night as I tend to be a night owl and stay up late trying to get sleep that fails me. I see others struggling with their own personal demons from failed relationships and then there is others who are in the primes of their life trying to find their perfect partner to settle down with. So much hurt and happiness in a days worth of discussions to write a Hollywood Soap Opera. Perhaps I should write a screenplay?

I have been involved in three serious relationships through the last 14-15 years of my life, each ending in some painful memory or experience and sending me running with my tail tucked snugly between my legs. God was gracious enough to allow me to partake in the gift of life and as a result I now have four beautiful children. They are my life and the light to brighten a dark day. When things get me down I always remember that they love me unconditionally no matter how many miles separate us, and I return the same. I am sure those of you who have kids know exactly what I am talking about.

You may find that on the show, I joke about Jesse's mom every chance I get. She is a wonderful woman, who works hard for everything she has in life and she has brought Jesse along well. I also have this odd infatuation with llamas as most of you know. No I really don't own llamas, or molest them for that matter. In fact I have only seen a llama in real life from the comfort of my car in passing or on television. I don't think I have every seen one up close and personal. I would like to though cause they are a rather intriguing animal.

Well I think that's enough sharing for this week. I have given you plenty to think about over the next few days. I am sure we can take inventory of our lives and find areas we all need to work on to better ourselves in the "real world". I know I sure do. I cuss to much. That's one area I need to work on. Won't you join me next time to take a walk with me through my mind? You may find something you like in here. If you do find something wont you tell me about? Feel free to leave me a comment. Let me know how I am doing on the show or even how I am as a tour guide. See you all soon. God Bless.